Spending time with dad

Early Literacy | Sep 09, 2010

by Susan Ramsay, Early Literacy Specialist

Gavin and his dad sat snuggled on top of Gavin’s bed. “In the great green room there was a telephone, and a red balloon, and a picture of the cow jumping over the moon.” The first pages of “Goodnight Moon” by Margaret Wise Brown were open between them as Gavin’s dad began to read. Even though two-year-old Gavin had delayed speech and was receiving support from a speech therapist, he loved books, especially books read to him by his dad. Gavin and his dad looked at each page slowly, discovering all of the things that the rabbit character in the book wanted to say goodnight to before giving in to sleep.

“Goodnight stars. Good night air. Good night noises everywhere,” Gavin’s dad read as he closed the book. “Think we could say goodnight to the things in your room too?” he asked.

Gavin nodded. His dad switched off the bedside light and flicked on a flashlight. “Goodnight.....” Gavin could hear his dad’s voice call out and pause expectantly in the darkness. Gavin watched as the beam of light weaved around the room, finally settling on Gavin’s favourite stuffed animal. After several seconds Gavin finished his dad’s sentence with something that sounded a lot like “bear!” Dad repeated “Goodnight bear!” He gave Gavin a hug and handed him the flashlight. It was Gavin’s turn to find something in his room to wish a good night.

Gavin is fortunate. His dad loves to be involved in all aspects of son’s life. Whether it’s mealtime, bedtime or playtime, his dad adds his own style of caring for his child that is different from Gavin’s mom.

Research about the changing role of fathers from provider to caregiver over the past few decades reinforces what we already intuitively know. Dads –whether stay-at home or employed, whether from traditional, blended or same sex partnerships – impact children significantly by being actively involved in their daily lives and routines.

Mothers and fathers typically care for children differently from one another. Research shows that mothers tend to talk more while interacting with their children. Dads tend to talk less but be more physical in their interactions with their children and to take more risks. Child development experts tell us that it is the balance of both of these approaches that give children the security and confidence to learn and experience new things.

The Canadian Father Involvement Initiative recognizes and supports the invaluable role dads play in the lives of their children. Their website http://www.cfii.ca/ provides information and ideas for all dads with children from birth to teens.

Some community groups or Early Years Centres also offer play groups just for dads and their children. Contact your local Early Years Centre to find out what is available for dads in your community.

What should Gavin and his dad read tomorrow night? “Just Me And My Dad” by Mercer Mayer might be the perfect choice.

Susan Ramsay is the Early Literacy Specialist for Hastings, Frontenac, Lennox & Addington. You can contact her at 613-354-6318 (ext 32)